I’ve recently been reminded by my soul that being kind, forgiving and accepting of others flows directly into being loving and appreciative of myself- and vice versa. We cannot see the beauty in others that we are unwilling to see within ourselves. In honor of that insight, I was guided to revisit a blog post of mine.
In a 2017 episode of Oprah Winfrey’s “Super Soul Sunday” (1), she featured an experiment on self-perception conducted by BuzzFeed. A group of volunteers each stood for a few minutes in front of a two-way mirror sharing their perceptions of themselves while other volunteers secretly hidden behind the mirror were taped sharing how they perceived that person. Then, the volunteers were shown their particular video about their positive features. Time and again, those features which others noted as particularly striking or beautiful in the person were the same aspects that the person disliked or doubted about themselves.
One volunteer shared that he was self-conscious of his round face, especially his cheeks, yet his nice cheek bones was one of the features that the secret observers said they appreciated. Another admitted that he didn’t feel particularly manly, yet one observer saw him as definitely masculine and another as a “cool guy”. One volunteer said that she was self-conscious of her dimples, yet one of the observers commented that he really liked her smile, especially her “cute dimples”.
Upon seeing the strangers’ comments about themselves, many of the participants were blown away by the differences between their self-perceptions and the impressions of others. One participant said, “You’re better than who you think you are. And… you’re enough just the way you are. So be kinder to yourself.” This could be a message directly from each person’s soul.
Marsha Hankins has twice posted a wonderful blog called The Parable of the Cracked Pot about the beauty of a cracked pot that thought it was lesser than others because it was broken. Then the water bearer pointed out that the water it leaked along the path had helped beautiful flowers to grow for others to enjoy. It is the illusion that we are lesser than or broken for being unique. What we may perceive as flaws are hidden strengths that are still lost in the illusion. All we need to do is shine our light of awareness to see the truth and beauty of the perfection underneath.
Ask your soul to help you answer this question: What beauty within are you still hiding from yourself and the world? In her blog “What Gifts Do You Have to Offer?”, Lori Rock reminds us of the value of continuing to look for ways to bring forward our uniqueness, both for our own healing and for our part in helping heal the world. In closing, she shares this wisdom: “As you embrace your own self-love, your gift for each other will flow easily and your adoration will surely show you as the wise one you are.”
picture courtesy of FrankWinkler on Pixabay
1 “Geneen Roth.” Super Soul Sunday, created by Oprah Winfrey, OWN, originally aired April 30, 2017.